GeoGuessr is a website where you are thrown into a random spot in the world on Google Maps streetview, and you have to try and guess where you are.
It’s fun to play just by itself, to see how close you can get, but it’s even more fun when you put a spin on it: writing a description of each random area you’re given.
During the last stream, chat and I played a game of GeoGuessr. Just like when we’ve done this before, we were given five random locations anywhere in the world, and we had to guess where they were.
And for each one, we had to write a short description of the area, trying to make it as vivid and detailed as possible.
AND! We also got a random mood to set the tone of the description, something like: cheerful, depressed, anxious, or excited.
Here’s some highlights of what me/chat came up with for each location, with some of my favorite phrases bolded.
Location #1: Peru
Random Mood: Drunk
ME
The old cemetery ain’t no good no more. Back in the day, when Old James was still at the corner store ‘cross from the stones ‘n bones as we called it, sold us commie cocktails — vodka and corn syrup — for a nickel ‘n a wink. The kids’d only take a sip between ‘em before spittin’ out the rest and dumpin’ it on the graves. That was what the corpses craved! Not these newfangled ribbons and crosses. The hell the dead gonna do with that crap? Poor Old James, when the lightnin’ burnt his shop and skin all crispy, his mam and pap dressed him up in his Sunday best for all eternity. But we can still give him what he craves. A sneaky little drink at midnight ain’t never hurt no one. ‘Cept those conflabbed sheep lickin’ up the leftover dirt-and-sour commies in the mornin’.COZYROGERS
This’ th’perfect place fer alcohol. Amongst th’ sea o’ graves to the right; drink fer them who can’t drink no more. Alongside th’ endless muddy road, curl up in a ditch and drink to poor sod who had to dig it. Hidden away in a wall-less shack, drink ’til you can’t no more, and use the sheep as pillows once ‘yer finished countin’ em. Drink! T’wasted infrastructure! ‘Cause ain’t nobody here but us.REALSAYAKA
Bravado bought with beer, a branded bottle clear, his sloshing stomach steers, to this graveyard, cold and queer. Shrouded pride, footwork wide, aimless smug joyride, his boozed head straddles tombs occupied. Spirits stir within, faces old and grim, staggered focus conjure ghosts of sin. Mirthful merry minds cast aside; their dark denied, only painted joy, til’ deepest sleep. Alcoholics weep, as purifying rest brings painful thoughts repressed.
Location #2: Scotland
Random Mood: Hungry
ME
Hunger eats away more than your stomach. It devours your inhibitions, gnaws away at your vision. Rolling mountains of never ending salad bars, heavy on the ruffage but anything going down is better than nothing. Little buds bursting by the roadside, a squeeze of green dressing to take the edge off biting sharpened tips into sticks. Baa baa wafts through the air like an unlit grill. Fuzzy mutton steaks on four legs, cooking the greens inside them into salivating sinew. Time to skewer some kebab.COZYROGERS
Beef. Beef all around me. Delicious Gyro, just standing there in the middle of the field, only a rusty barbed-wire fence between them and my rumbling stomach. Give me a few more hours, and I might even decide I need some iron in my diet. Old McDonald isn’t gonna be happy, but a man’s gotta eat, and there ain’t a McDonalds in sight.BOBICUS
I want this land. I see the sheep, biting down on yet unnibbled flora, ripping and tearing. I want to get down on my knees and bite down with them, rip up the plants by their roots, crunch the white rocks on the road’s shoulder into dust. I want to dig into the productive dirt below, stick my face in it, coming up with teeth full of earthworms. Trees hedge the side of the road–I would become the chainsaw. Hills rise up in the distance–then I would be the wind and rain, tearing them down. This land will be mine, is mine, and I shall shape it how I wish. I will consume it.REALSAYAKA
Where darkness falls, whenever nocturne’s silver shawl shrouds, I’ll crawl beneath the clouds. To lick their razor fence, to howl at their ‘defence’, I smell their BEATING HEARTS, INTENSE! My cravings, chaos carried far, I slip between the bar, my fur leaves traces, odd, bizarre. Their pungent scent carries, as claws come unfurled, their poor precious world… bloodcurdling dying groans, lamented woes, my jaws dig unopposed. Fleshy chunks fill, their floundering will, my untamed hunger, restless still. As pitiful dead eyes stare wide, I disappear in fear, before light draws hunters near…
Location #3: Belgium
Random Mood: Stressed
ME
The trees all grow to the same height, same width, same barren branches reaching out for any warmth. Inches from their neighbor, never allowed to touch, only watch and make sure the other trees do the same. They keep an eye on the identical houses that line the street — stout bulbs of dry and sour wood, pretending. All of the fruit, pale and choking aboveground, so the gnarled roots may curl and gorge in the cold darkness below.BOBICUS
The trees are thin rows and the grass is short and shorn. Teeny tiny fences defining useless land, laying plain and bare next to plainer and barer fallow ground. A nothing town, a nothing land–but still the fence. Hedged, contained. Nowhere to go but the road. A shrine to Jesus squats on the side of the road. Maybe he’ll take you in, these people certainly won’t. Maybe someone died there. Certainly didn’t stay here.
Location #4: South Africa
Random Mood: Melancholy
ME
Recycling is for places that have hope. Places where children grow up to have children of their own, repeating, reusing, repairing — not here. This is where, eventually, you get taken behind the rusted fence and never seen again. A dead end in nature’s cycle. The only way to make your mark is by leaving behind an infection on the world. Grinding your cans and bottles and loose teeth deep into the earth. Hated by the next generation, but at least not forgotten.BOBICUS
The roads are dirt, the fences iron. The trash, plastic. Three chickens peck in a nearly empty corral, scratching at the dry soil. Nothing flows here. Things seep. The water seeps through the branches of the stout trees, avoiding the shallow roots of the straw grass. Money seeps through the community, iron fences going up to protect what little there is to be had from those who have not. People seep through and walk slowly, dragging their feet. There is a highway near here, a river of traffic that flows. You wouldn’t know it but by the contraptions that trundle through. A fence of iron and glass between their world and this one.COZYROGERS
Children shot by cameramen like animals in a safari.REALSAYAKA
The hunger pangs hound, burning sunlight abound, baking asphalt grounds – our loving battleground. Practised poverty, promised pain, this penniless country – hope’s bane. Where water wains, where criminals leave dark stains, on empty, drying plains. Darkness conjures cold, and barrels lit ablaze, find fates foretold, pollution raised. Of times forgotten, colonized and raped, two hundred years of history shaped, this nation staggers weak, so brilliantly bleak.
Location #5: Ontario, Canada
Random Moon: Horny
ME
The trees fill me with a poison oak rash, screaming to be itched, craving thick cream’s cool splash, no matter how hard I scratch, it’s never enough. Flesh against bark, rough and steady, the only thing that makes me ready, flushed face pooling, off comes the clothing, grandma isn’t watching anymore. Up and down in and out, release the moan but hold the shout, sap flows and drips out from its cavity, exquisite sticky sensual depravity lubrication for the penetration of the vegetation on sinful vacation ending in bursting gestation but it feels so much better than
grandma’s station
wagon
tailpipeCOZYROGER
Long, hard, hot and black, I rode atop it towards an uncertain horizon. Green erections — healthy and girthy – surround me on all sides. There is no escape. If this goes on, I’m going to explode.BOBICUS
The middle of nowhere, where no one would ever see; where the deer and moose rut. Nothing but the pollen-laden pine trees, spreading their sex into the air. The asphalt drags on, rough, yet tender against the latex and rubber curves of a tire. Flowering flora rise up the ditches on the side of the road reaching out to touch the thick black tar.
Signs are posted into the ground, thick rods penetrating the wet earth, erecting the white letters once painted on with the gentle touch of a horsehair brush.ERICADEEL
As the world turns, the earthen forest plunges itself deeper into the cerulean sky. The trees thrust their length higher and higher into the void, toward that bright shining sunspot they crave but can never quite reach. The earth moans: a quiver here, a tremor there, and fissures erupt on its surface in a torrent of pleasure.REALSAYAKA
The sports car, sleek and crimson, sat idly by, exhaust – a longing sigh. The young couple, love entwined, kissily giddily giggled into the warm treeline. With unseen speed did clothes find purchase, flat and careless on the green, bodies touched keen, most obscene. Rough bark pounds open flesh, female moans astound. Poor squirrels sat in shock, that giant jock cock unlocked her frock, straight out of wedlock. Lifted legs languish on weak branches, summer leaves drop in glee, carefree, those horny escapees.
If you want to join us and help write a story by trolling in chat, or share your own writing for feedback, then we’d love to have you join us on Twitch.
And you missed the stream, you can still watch them on the YouTube channel or watch the full stream reruns.
Hope to see you next time, friend!
